Shut Up, Owl!

Hi!  I'm Jake!

Not sure if this is just some sort of Texas thing, but ever since I moved down here to Austin, everywhere I go, there's an owl yelling "Who-wa-who! Who-wa-who!"- all day and all night!

I have never heard this bird call before. So it was cool to hear a new bird and try to figure out what that bird was.  Turns out it's an owl.

At first I liked the owls.  They sound silly. Every day when my wife and I woke up, we'd hear that goofy-ass owl.  We'd make fun of it and have a laugh.  Good times.
An artist's rendition of what the
stupid owl probably looks like.
© 2013 by Jake Sharon, ARR

That owl is always there, like a constant friend. It's so repetitive, it's silly.

That owl is always there, like a constant itch. It's so repetitive, it's hellacious!

Have you ever had a cool friend that you like to hang out with?  What if that cool friend never ever left?  That would get real old. Well, this owl is outside our apartment all day and night.  Sometimes it wakes us up like a m-er f-ing rooster.  Hey owl!  You're not a rooster!  You're an owl!  Go eat some mice or find out how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop!  Whatever you do, shut up!  Just shut up!  Shut up!

Also, we've never even seen the owl. It's hiding hiding all the time.  At least let us take look at you, you sneaky bastard!

At first the owl was cool, but now we realize it's just a loudmouthed, sneaky bastard- like a comedy show heckler that only shuts up when the comedian asks what he said so he can respond to it.  Frickin wuss!

Bye!  I'm Jake!