Whether you have a birthday, get promoted, get gay married, get non-gay married, or pay off your student loans, Pig Pics are a horrible way to celebrate.
WARNING!
Pig Pics are crude. If you keep reading this blog entry, you will see crudely drawn animals doing crudely inappropriate things. Instead of reading this entry and viewing this garbage, go do something else.
If you disregard this warning, and then get mad at these pictures, then that is because you don't know how warnings work. Warnings mean stay away!
Enough oinking. Enjoy the following Pig Pics.
WARNING!
Pig Pics are crude. If you keep reading this blog entry, you will see crudely drawn animals doing crudely inappropriate things. Instead of reading this entry and viewing this garbage, go do something else.
If you disregard this warning, and then get mad at these pictures, then that is because you don't know how warnings work. Warnings mean stay away!
Enough oinking. Enjoy the following Pig Pics.
Enough oinking. Enjoy the following Pig Pics.
WHO HAS A BIRTHDAY OR ANOTHER REASON TO CELEBRATE??!?!?
Every day when I log onto facebook, I check to see which of my facebook friends has a birthday or some other reason to celebrate. Then I put the following comment (or a modification of this comment) on their profile:
Happy Birthdays! To help commemorate this special occasion, I will mail you one of my #pigpics- for free! Check out my Pig Pics, tell me what kind you want and I will send you one!
http://www.jakeisfantastic.com/2015/03/pig-pics-celebration-3.html
Most of the people who receive this comment just "like" it or ignore it. However, some people send me a private facebook message- along with their home address- and what they want for a picture. They give me their address! Now I know where they live!
I named the snowman who is feeding the poop-eating dragon "Jimmy Naccaratto."
While feeding the dragon his turds, the snowman Jimmy Naccaratto is warning the other snowmen and snowpigs to stay back. After all, just like snowman Jimmy Naccaratto, the real-life Jimmy Naccaratto is about to be an ambassador of public health and safety.
Still glad about the disgusting crap I sent your way, Jimmy? I am! This was a fun Pig Pic to make!
Also, please send me your teacher's addresses so I can congratulate them on having you in their classes.
Brent Peasley just paid off his motherfucking student loans. Then he forgot to end his sentence with a period. Good education
Happy Birthdays! To help commemorate this special occasion, I will mail you one of my #pigpics- for free! Check out my Pig Pics, tell me what kind you want and I will send you one!
http://www.jakeisfantastic.com/2015/03/pig-pics-celebration-3.html
CELEBRATORY PIG PICS I MADE LAST WEEK:
Jimmy Naccaratto
Jimmy just got into a great school. He deserves a Pig Pic!
Jimmy's facebook message to me:
So I made Jimmy a one-of-a-kind, tail-wetting, snowman-poop-eating dragon. That was the disgusting crap I sent his way.
I named the snowman who is feeding the poop-eating dragon "Jimmy Naccaratto."
Poop, splashes, and three sets of balls. This is how you celebrate! |
While feeding the dragon his turds, the snowman Jimmy Naccaratto is warning the other snowmen and snowpigs to stay back. After all, just like snowman Jimmy Naccaratto, the real-life Jimmy Naccaratto is about to be an ambassador of public health and safety.
Still glad about the disgusting crap I sent your way, Jimmy? I am! This was a fun Pig Pic to make!
Also, please send me your teacher's addresses so I can congratulate them on having you in their classes.
Stand-up Comedy Money Pig
Brent has supportive friends. That is worth almost as much as a Pig Pic! |
Brent's facebook message to me:
I live near Brent! Now that I know where he lives, I can visit him! |
As ordered, a pig doing stand-up, shitting on money. Look at the poop splash on the money bag! As a bonus, both the pig and his dick are hanging- INXS style! |
This is what blind faith gets you, Brent! Hang in there!
Dedicated, Defecating, Defecting Snowpig
Pig Pics are great for helping celebrate your birthday!
This is what you get when you can't spell correctly. |
And there is a dick. That part was just a bonus. Sometimes when you get a free Pig Pic, you may also get a Pig Pic Dick! Happy Birthday, you commie!
Bacon is Good!
Another birthday celebration! This time, for the son of one of the guys who books me to do comedy!
Jerod's facebook message to me:
After receiving his Pig Pic, Jerod posted it on facebook and said it was better than he imagined! Seriously?
Happy birthday, Jerod! Glad your picture was better than you expected. Glad you are a good dad. Glad your dad got to see how much you like pigs eating other pig's dicks!
Shitty Pig Arms
Pig Pics are great to help celebrate any occasion! Ryan Williams you just got his one-man improv show, Improv Kumate, into a sweet improv festival! Congrats, Ryan Williams!
See, Sean Patrick Conaway? I do typos too! Maybe I should defecate to Russia! |
After Ryan sent me his address, I asked him to help The Wedding AlBUM Kickstarter Campaign.
Mailing people gifts is the first step to extorting money from them! |
Wow! He actually gave me money! WTF? Gotta do this more often! |
Shitty Pig Arms is worth $5! |
Ryan Williams is so excited he received his Pig Pic! He emailed me this photo!
I like Shitty Pig Arms so much I turned it into a t-shirt. This is what I emailed Ryan!
Why is a picture of Ben Kronberg on my wall? That is creepy. |
SUMMARY:
If you want a free Pig Pic, then make sure you are my facebook friend. On your birthday, or whenever I notice you are celebrating, I will leave you a comment. If you are silly enough to respond, I will send you a FREE Pig Pic!
Or, if you want a celebratory Pig Pic for your friend or relative or whomever, please contact me and we'll work something out.
POLL RESULTS:
Oh yeah: I recently asked people how they feel about the recently re-designed jakeisfantastic.com. 100% of the people responded that you want more nudy pics. You guys are immature.
Bye! I'm Jake!