Today, I am in Birmingham, Alabama. My fiance and I are en route from Raleigh, North Carolina to Austin, Texas. That's a 22-hour drive.
Travel is a great way to bond with a loved one. You spend every second with them. Soon, every thought, every emotion, every aspect of that other person becomes transparent. You both see the same things all day- then you see how the other person saw those same things. Mutual understanding of each other is destiny.
When you spend 22 hours in a car with a loved one, it's really easy to say something that will piss them off! Just when you are relaxed and you think you understand them, you ask them something dumb like "So, you know how you drink and I don't? When you're pregnant someday, are you the kind of mom that thinks it's ok to have a glass of wine each day?" I asked this question out of curiosity- and hope that the answer was no. I've seen it movies. I've seen it in real life. Society seems to think it's ok for women to have a glass of wine or two while they're preggers. I don't think it's okay, but society does, so I had to ask.
Initially, she said no. Then, as she let the thought marinate, she got super-offended. "I can't believe you'd think I'd be the kind of mom who'd drink when she's pregnant! What kind of person do you think I am?!"
Then, even though I was driving 9 over the speed limit, I was back-pedaling about 2,000 miles per hour. I was trying to back pedal myself back in time.
"Um, I , uh, er , duh. Whoops! I mean, I know you're not the kind of mom who smokes while pregnant. And I know you're not going to be a drunk, pregnant mommy, but I just wanted to know about the one glass of wine thing! I just wanted to know... I love you."
The thing is, it was a tough question, but I'd rather know the answer than just assume the answer. My future baby's brain damage is at stake!
I did get to know my fiancée just a little better yesterday. I learned that when I ask a "reasonable question" and she gets mad, I have to calm her down by letting her listen to her awful country music for the rest of the trip. That's the sacrifice you have to pay for asking the tough questions and getting to know your fiancée.
I also learned that "We can talk about anything" means "We can talk about anything, but watch your ass! It's going to cost you! Also, don't get mad when I ask a tough question, because that will cost you too!"
Bye! I'm Jake!